Testophobia

     Testophobia is a physiological condition in which people experience extreme stress, anxiety, and discomfort during and/or before taking a test. Students, like me, are most likely afraid from failing a test in any subjects. I easily feel the pressure on my nerves and the stress when I think about the upcoming tests. Also, whenever there is a test I tend to have an abnormal heart rate because it keeps on beating faster than usual. And then my hand starts to feel chilly and my insides turn upside down.  What worries me even more are results and what if my best wasn't good enough.

       First on the list, I worry and fear if my scores are going to be low or low when the answer sheets are being or will be handed out. I think it is a norm for everybody to worry about those scores because it is a part of our grades. Tests in college are more worrisome because there aren’t a lot of chances where in you can pull your scores higher. As a matter of fact, you really need to burn the candle at both ends for you to pass that certain subject. As a result bags under the eyes and dark circles would be visible and evident.

     And second, the thing I’m frightened of is my grades especially if it’s low or it would be low. Low test results can trigger low grades in the end, so I often think about it as a bitter end and bitter start for my first ever semester. And then it keeps on swirling on my mind how would my parents react if I had those low grades and probably they would be disappointed. One thing I hate is that when my parents starts a sermon about me not giving my best shot to achieve higher. I just can’t stand the fact that there is a pool of expectations and it’s drowning me.

     Whatever the results maybe, a lot of my classmates often say that there is always a next time and that those scores won’t determine our future. Yes those are indeed true and it motivates me to move on. Even if you fail once or several times you just can’t give up and think that you’re hopeless or you won’t be able to make it. Chances are given for you to give it a try again even if you’ll end up falling you just have to show your efforts and stand up once again. I think I just definitely have to think positively given that I always give my best whenever there are exams. But then I just can’t overcome this anxiety today but soon enough, hopefully, I can get rid of the worries I feel whenever there are exams even if it’s written or true to life tests.